The cost of living is making it easier for abusers to get away with their crimes

“I had to beg him. I’ve never begged for money off anyone, it’s the worst thing in the world.”

That’s Rachel (not her real name), who spoke to Quids in! about how she and her two children lived on £60 a month – not because that’s all there was in the bank, but because it’s all she was allowed from her ex. She was suffering financial abuse.

Before falling under her partner’s control, Rachel was self-employed and good with money. She paid her own bills and had a mortgage, but after her partner moved in he started up a business. Rachel lost her job and began working for her partner – but all the money always went into his bank account. And that’s when she began to beg him for cash – for things like mortgage repayments and kids’ shoes. He would fob her off, then go and spend hundreds of pounds on things for himself.

The Covid pandemic and now the cost-of-living crisis have had a crushing impact on those suffering economic abuse. Research published by the charity Surviving Economic Abuse (SEA) found the average amount of total debt owed is now £20,000 – more than six times what it was in 2020. Perhaps not surprisingly, this figure is expected to rise.

The number of people who could not access £100 at short notice has also spiraled, they found.

Economic abuse or financial abuse?

There’s a difference between the two. SEA describes financial abuse as a sub-category of the broader concept of economic abuse. Put simply, economic abuse can include the various ways an abuser can control someone’s situation – including their work, home or travel. Financial abuse is more specific, things like controlling the money or forcing a partner into debt.

While it can happen to anyone, women are vastly more likely to be affected. In fact, SEA calculates that a staggering one in six women in the UK has suffered from one or both types of abuse. Which begs the question – why aren’t we talking about it more?

One of the problems is that economic abuse can be difficult for others to spot. On the face of it, someone may appear, like Rachel, to be financially able and independent. They may own a home and a car. Spending (or not spending) can for the most part be hidden from friends and family. While it often occurs alongside other forms of abuse, it doesn’t have to. The absence of violence in the relationship does not for a second mean the abuse is not real – and criminal. 

Economic abuse is now specifically outlined in law in England and Wales under the Domestic Abuse Act, in Scotland under the Domestic Abuse (Scotland) Act and in Northern Ireland under the Domestic Abuse and Civil Proceedings Act (Northern Ireland). Under these acts, the abuse is likely to be treated as coercive control. It can carry a prison sentence.

‘But why do they stay?’

We know that it’s never as easy as that. Victims cannot “just leave”. Economic abusers can control the behaviour of their partner, right down to the tiniest details. When someone can’t lay their hands on even a small sum of money, they can be trapped or forced to return to the abuse. SEA says that anecdotally, the cost of living is allowing abusers even more control over their partners.

“We know that domestic abuse, including economic abuse, can happen to any woman regardless of her circumstances or background,” the charity says. “However, someone who is in a more financially precarious position will have less recourse to support, fewer options and may be less able to leave. Women who can’t find £100 at short notice are three and a half times more likely to experience domestic abuse.

“We are seeing how the cost-of-living crisis is making this worse for people – data from the Financial Support Line showed that 67 per cent of victim-survivors of domestic abuse are already in a negative budget or have less than £100 surplus at the end of each month.”

Rising debts can leave women unable to leave the abuse and make them vulnerable to even more physical, emotional and economic harm.

SEA has also found that the rising cost of living is giving abusers new ways to exert control – turning on appliances to run up bills in their partner’s name or standing in the way of government cost-of-living payments. Or they can remove a car or phone with the excuse that they’re no longer affordable.

And they can pivot to blame their partner for their own economic difficulties, by saying she should have had more in savings or spent money more wisely.

And what about those of us who may be in a position to spot signs of abuse? As well as signposting to the SEA website, the charity also recommends the Financial Support Line, which it runs along with Money Advice Plus. Crucially, access to cash can make a huge difference to a survivor’s ability to escape – so speedy advice on grants, benefits and cost-of-living payments is vital.

How banks can help

All banks will have their own policies for helping survivors, but there are guidelines in place to ensure a minimum level of support. There’s also a voluntary code banks can sign up to. In the first instance, the bank should have staff who are specifically trained in dealing with people who are vulnerable after suffering economic abuse (callers should ask to speak to someone on the vulnerable customer team). They’ll lay out all the options available without applying any pressure, and offer confidential and flexible support. 

The bank can change PINs and passwords and issue new ones, and they can send correspondence to a different address. They can also remove an abuser’s access to the account. With a joint account, the bank may be able to help a survivor de-link their finances.

If someone wants a new account, the bank should be able to arrange this without the usual ID if this is hard to access. They can use things like a letter from a refuge, social worker or council instead. And when a survivor has been locked out of their finances by an abuser, the bank can bring them up to speed with details on any savings or debt they have.

‘Something really good about getting stuff off your chest’

Before her relationship ended, Rachel had put her partner’s name on her mortgage. He pressured her and was jealous of a previous partner, so she agreed.

After she came to Clean Slate (the financial wellbeing organisation that runs Quids in! Pro and Quids in!) for help, she spoke to her support worker every week. “There was something really good about just getting stuff off your chest,” Rachel says.

She got back into work with two part-time jobs and was able to start looking at rebuilding her life and clearing her debts. She’s come a long way.

“The first thing I’d say is don’t panic,” she says. “Because at the very beginning I think that’s what I did. Now that I’m earning myself, it’s so much more positive. I’m still in the hole at the moment, because I still owe loads of money but now everybody’s happy with what I’m paying.

“There’s light at the end of the tunnel.”

For anyone who needs help, support or advice with any of these issues, Surviving Economic Abuse has a support line on 0808 1968845 (open Monday-Friday 9am-1pm and 2pm-5pm).

The Financial Ombudsman can help if a bank isn’t offering the support it should. And anyone in imminent danger from a partner should of course call 999.